Find Your Peace: A Faith Filled Nervous System Regulation Podcast

Why Your Healing Keeps Going in Circles (And What to Do About It)

• Jen • Season 3 • Episode 11

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Ever feel like you're stuck on a healing hamster wheel? You're not alone. In this powerful conversation, co-coaches Jen and Brittany reveal why traditional healing approaches sometimes fall short—and the missing pieces that changed everything for them.

Discover the three-part nature of healing (spirit, soul, and body) and why addressing just one area might leave you feeling frustrated and incomplete. From chronic health symptoms that mysteriously return to emotional triggers that catch you off guard, learn to recognize what your pain is actually trying to tell you.

Whether you're dealing with nervous system dysregulation, recurring emotional patterns, or physical symptoms that doctors can't explain, this episode offers hope and practical insights for your healing journey. Plus, hear real testimonies of transformation and get guidance on where to start your own path to wholeness

SPEAKER_01:

So, welcome back to the Finding Your Peace Regulate Your Nervous System podcast. I'm super excited to have my co-coach Brittany here with me again. Brittany, thanks for joining me.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, thanks for having me. I love that term, co-coach.

SPEAKER_01:

So today we are going to be talking about the many individual healing sessions that are available, right? Um, and both of us have experienced, like in our healing journeys, uh, the process of feeling like sometimes we're going in circles, right? And yes, like share with anyone that's listening today why we have figured out why that is.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, first of all, for me, it was a long journey to get to that answer. But um, I never considered that we are spirit, soul, and body. And it wasn't until I got around a community that helped to teach me that we are three parts. So just like God is three parts, we are three parts. We are spirit, soul, and body. And because of that, that means that we can experience pain in a multitude of different ways. Um, it can be more than just spirit, it can also be soul and it can also be body, it could be any combination of that as well. And um, so when I first started like my healing journey of like deep dive and and going after it, I did a lot of spiritual healing and it was amazing and it helped me. But the tricky part was is I kept coming back for spiritual healing over and over and over. Did you experience that too?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, I mean, my story is so, so similar. Like my body would freak out, right? And you know, and then my emotions would freak out, like almost like they believed that the healing that I had received like wasn't true.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, that's that's so real. That's so real because it happened to me too, where I would leave the session and I'd be like, I'm healed, I'm good to go, and I thought it was great, and then it wouldn't take long, and I was kind of falling back into repeated patterns and cycles. And the hard part about that is that the enemy then uses that to shame us. I don't know if you experienced a ton of shame in this process.

SPEAKER_01:

So much, yeah. Like he just comes after you with it.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, yes, and I kept thinking, I'm the one, I'm the problem, I'm doing something wrong. And so again, I'd go back for more spiritual healing. Now, that's not to say that the spirit isn't involved in all of this, I just want to be clear. Like, I don't hear what I'm not saying. Of course, we need Jesus in every aspect of this, but there's layers, and some of those layers include healing the soul or healing the body. And I know, Jen, you are amazing at healing the body. I'd love to hear your perspective on body healing.

SPEAKER_01:

Well, for me, it was like I would leave the spiritual healing sessions. Um, and when we speak of spiritual healing, we mean um just solely inner healing, right? Yes, yes, and that's when that only that inner healing is addressed. And again, there's nothing wrong with that. It has helped both of us tremendously. It just wasn't the end of the story. Um, so like Britney, I would leave these sessions and I would like, I've got it all figured out. I am healed, I am whole, and then within like 24 hours, my body would just freak out, and all of my chronic health symptoms would just come raging back. And it was like my body didn't believe like what just happened and needed to let me know there's actually trauma still trapped here, and so while your spirit is being healed, your soul and your body are still a disaster.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, yes, literally, and that's what happened to me. And I will say, it's not to say that I didn't need body healing, I just think the phases that the Lord was leading me to started with my spirit and then became my soul. And then I moved on to body. But what he was working on in that season was really my soul. So he was allowing me to see, like, hey, this modality isn't working to heal what you're trying to heal. So I would leave and my emotions would be a mess, and I would be shaming myself, I'd be hating myself because I would think I was the problem. And that didn't help my healing, right? Like nothing felt like it stuck because I was constantly in this like turmoil from the enemy attacking me because I wasn't able to hold on to my healing, and that was really hard. So good. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01:

So how would you differentiate how we move from spirit to soul healing?

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, you know, it's so hard because we are so intertwined, interconnected. Um, but soul healing has to do with more of like the heart, the emotions. When we're little, um, there's a lot of stuff that happens to us, and I I it's hard to use the word trauma, but I'm gonna use the word trauma. I know trauma has a lot of connotations. It does. The thing I want to say, yes, and the thing I want to say about that word is what's trauma for one person might look different for another. So I also want to erase like kind of the the stigma around it has to be a certain level in order for it to be trauma because what are the differences?

SPEAKER_01:

One of the things I learned in my trauma training is it's actually not about the event, it's actually about how we internalize the event. So, you know, one person can go through this really horrific event that we all would agree was horrific, and another person can go through something that maybe we'd think, well, that didn't really seem like that big of a deal, but it's how we internalize it and how we process it where it becomes trauma. So the event actually doesn't matter. Agreed, not that people's pain doesn't matter, it's actually just we attach all these um ideas of what trauma has to look like for us to have trauma. So I'm sorry, continue.

SPEAKER_02:

That's all right. No, I love that description, and really I think you nailed it, you know, perfectly because the trauma is sort of creates this house that the pain and emotions then live in related to that event. So then the event is housed in this separate area, and oftentimes because we're so little and we don't have the tools to necessarily process all that we've gone through, we'll split off. Yeah. And so um, a lot of times we call that fracturing, we call that a part, you know, there's a lot of different terminologies we can put on that. But what it boils down to is our soul separates so that we can continue to move through life, yeah, even with this pain that would have been way too overwhelming if we had to process through it on a day-to-day basis.

SPEAKER_01:

Survival mechanism.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes, a hundred percent. And and you know, the other thing that I want to say is like, as you know, right, like our body is always trying to keep us safe. Yes, always, every day, all day, that's its rule. So one of its safety mechanisms that God allowed us to be built with is the ability to split off. So, for example, if someone had pain from, say, a parent and it was traumatic pain, that splitting off allows that little one who would have no other choice but to live in that household with that parent to still continue on without having to deal with it on a day-to-day basis. So it is a protection mechanism.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, absolutely. That's such a great description of it.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. And then so what hard work does is it actually goes back for those little parts that are separated to heal them so that we can get the pain that was um not comforted or the need that wasn't met resolved to heal that, tear down the house and allow that little one to come back so that we can be whole.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh, that's such a good explanation. Yes. It's such a good explanation.

SPEAKER_01:

And so, so what kind of like things did you notice in your life after you started doing some of this soul work, heart work that that changed for you?

SPEAKER_02:

Uh one of the biggest things is my immediate response. So I would say triggers, okay? Triggers are a huge indication of what's happening in our hearts. Yes. And the bigger the trigger, chances are the smaller that you are that the pain occurred. And so a lot of times we'll just go day to day and then something will happen, and we'll find ourselves, let's say, from zero to 10, we'll find ourselves in a level 10 trigger. Yeah. And now, of course, we'll shame ourselves and be like, that was an overreaction. Why did we do it? Well, we have to stop doing that because what we're doing in that is we're actually partnering with the enemy and allowing ourselves to be shamed, just like our story earlier, right? Of the shame that we would feel after our healing. Right. Or or perceived that we didn't heal in that in those moments, right? Yes, a hundred percent, a hundred percent. So we have to stop that and we have to go, okay, my heart's trying to tell me that there's a pain here, pain that wasn't comforted or a need that wasn't met here, that's actually small that I need to go back for. And those are warnings, those are warnings letting us know it's our heart saying, Hey, I still have something here that needs to be dealt with. And so, as tough as it is, we can actually start to look at triggers as a benefit, as a tool to help us bring healing to those younger versions.

SPEAKER_01:

That's so good. I mean, pain of all sorts is is trying to get our attention, right? Absolutely so whether it's heart pain or body pain, like it's it's something is trying to get our attention that there's still healing that needs to happen here.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. I mean, I think of you and and the the work you do on the body when people come in for pain, I would imagine that's telling a different story.

SPEAKER_01:

It is, yeah. Yeah, and sometimes it looks like I mean, sometimes pain can be classified as like chronic health symptoms too, or health symptoms that kind of move around the body, right? Um, one of the things I would just add to like how body work um differs from heart work or soul work a little bit is that um it manifests like in inside the body. So a lot of times the nervous system is bouncing things around, or you can't even like grab onto piece, if that makes sense, because your nervous system is such a disaster. And and I say that was your judgment because I lived most of my life with a nervous system that had no idea how to regulate. I did not know how to feel safe in my own body, I was constantly looking for the threat. So, for in my journey, like the the Lord went after my body first. I had tons of chronic health issues. I was dysregulated all the time. And for me, when I got my nervous system regulated and I went after my own body work with the Lord in this process that he took me through, I found that about 95% of what I had perceived as chronic health symptoms just disappeared.

SPEAKER_02:

Wow, that is 95%.

SPEAKER_01:

I would say close to that. Yeah. I mean, and that's stuff that I had been carrying for like 35, 40 years. Um, because from a very young age, like I just didn't have a lot of safety in my life.

SPEAKER_02:

Right. And really, it's your body saying, hey, I have pain. Like, not necessarily like actual physical, but like a need here, right? Right.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah. And for me, it was my nervous system, um, was just so dysregulated from all that my body had been through. Um, and when we don't deal with things and we shove them down, which is we know that's a survival mechanism. Again, it's one of those things that the Lord allowed our body to do for survival. Yes. Yes. However, when we shove it down and we disassociate and we don't deal with it, that's when it starts showing up in physical manifestations of health symptoms, of chronic pain, of chronic illness, all of those things, like it has to go somewhere, right? Yes, not to mention the physical changes that happen within the body when we're in a constant state of stress, like our adrenaline and our cortisol is pumping all of the time. And those are great hormones that that the Lord created for a reason. Yes. However, when they never shut off, like that becomes a problem. It's like if you thought about like if you turned your hose on and just left your hose on in your backyard forever, right? And never turned it off. So if if we think about the analogy of adrenaline and cortisol just pumping all of the time because we're in this constant state of stress, eventually that backyard is gonna flood. That's gonna start to cause all kinds of symptoms, all kinds of problems. It's gonna wreak havoc on everything in that backyard. And the body is no different when we don't deal with it, it starts to come out sideways in ways that we, you know, are not gonna be happy with.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. Well, and when you think about it, like oh, a hundred percent. And when you think about it, our body is using the mechanism it knows to speak to us, just like our heart is using the mechanism it knows to speak to us. And so while it did its job for what we needed when we were young, we then as adults, when we're capable and able to function and and have the tools that maybe we didn't have as kids, we then get the pleasure of going back, because God's outside of time, to work with him to help heal those younger versions that didn't get what they need. And I just think that's a beautiful way to be able to go back and for our bodies too, right? Because our bodies remember all of it.

SPEAKER_01:

They do, they do. Yeah, there's that uh incredible book, The Body Keeps a Score, um, which I don't agree with everything in that book, but there's so much goodness in that book of how our bodies really hold on to everything that we've been through. And if it's not dealt with, it just continues to show up in different ways throughout our life. So 100%. So good. Okay, so let's talk about if someone's listening to this and they are like, wow, I feel like I need all of that. Which also sane, just to be clear.

SPEAKER_02:

To be clear, we both have had all of it. So you're not alone.

SPEAKER_01:

If they don't know where to go to start with, where would you say is a good starting point, Brittany?

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah, you know, I mean, first and foremost, obviously the Lord's gonna lead you on a journey. So start with the Lord because you heard Jen's journey. She's she started after her spiritual healing started with the body, whereas mine was a little bit different. After my spiritual healing, I started with the soul. And so the Lord's gonna know the best path for you, but don't be surprised if you end up needing healing in all those areas because that pain hits us and it hits differently, it hits everyone differently, it impacts us differently. But chances are it probably have imp it probably has impacted both area, all three areas spiritually, our soul and our body. And so chances are you may need to get all three. And I just want to say that's beautiful, like you're not alone. Right, we've we've done all three, and and God is three, and so why wouldn't he heal us in threes, you know?

SPEAKER_01:

Absolutely, absolutely, and what what another thing I want to be just so clear about is that both of us are qualified to do both, yeah. Um, however, uh Brittany has an anointing on her life uh to be working on the heart, and I have an anointing on my life to be working on the body, so it's like we both can do both. So if you're gonna see, if you're trying to decide who to see, like you're not gonna mess up if you go to the wrong one first, like because we both can do both, but then there's just like a gifting that the Lord has naturally placed in both of us to just have like an anointing to carry healing through that area.

SPEAKER_02:

Does that am I making sense, Brittany? Is that a good way of stating it? 100%. And I think there's a layer you forgot because we first were both trained too in the spiritual side of healing. Yes, yes, we both are also trained in that. And and please believe that these sessions are all spiritually related. We don't do anything without God, we don't do anything without involving Holy Spirit and letting Holy Spirit lead the session. So um know that that's a safe place for that. Um absolutely.

SPEAKER_01:

And that's such a good point because so many of there's so many types of healings that are showing up in the marketplace these days that are are calling on, you know, energy work, on spiritual work, but they are not involving the Lord.

unknown:

Yes.

SPEAKER_01:

Um, and I just want to put that out there that that is not something we would ever recommend. Um not that Britney are the only people that you can see, because we know tons of people that are trained really well in Holy Spirit spiritual training. However, I just want to um proceed with caution of who you see and make sure that the Lord is their guide in these sessions because otherwise you can invite in all kinds of stuff that can actually cause more harm than good.

SPEAKER_02:

Amen. That's such a great point. And we're actually connected with a group of people that are involved in different types of healing, yes, that are anointed for different types of healing that all involve Holy Spirit, that believe Jesus' Lord, um, that are running after him. And so also if there's something that we feel or sense that, you know, there's another area of healing or something else that maybe is in our area of expertise, we're connected with a number of believers that are operating in their anointings to bring healing in a different way as well. Yes, that's such a good point.

SPEAKER_01:

That's such a good point. I love it. Yeah, um, so my next question. So when somebody comes in, this is a question that I get most often, and I'm sure you get it too. How long does it take?

SPEAKER_02:

Don't you love the response and people say it? And I'm gonna say it, it takes as long as it takes. As humans, then we want that. Like we want a quick fix. We want to know, can I do one and done? I want a one and done, I want to be fixed. Let's just get rid of it.

SPEAKER_01:

I know, and and same also. And then I will say, like, I had you know how many decades of stuff where I really wasn't operating the correct way. Um, so I shouldn't have been surprised that it took time, right? Yeah, and I would still say that I haven't arrived any place, like I am a million times healthier than I was. However, you know, our job, especially as people that are operating in these spaces, is make sure that we are as healthy as can be all of the time because we are going into dark places with people, and we need to be as healthy and healed and whole as we can at all times. So I know I speak for both of us when I say that this work on ourselves is not done.

SPEAKER_02:

Amen. Amen.

SPEAKER_01:

We both are diligent about making sure that when there are things in our lives, of course we go straight to the Lord. When there's things that we need backup and we need community, we have a community of people that we go to for our own healing. Um, because so many of our clients, again, they'll feel like, well, you know, it worked so quickly for you, but they didn't see the decade before that that I was going after healing. Just because the body work was the last step in really feeling like I kind of got over the huge hurdle of that healing doesn't mean that I didn't have a decade before that, right? Yes, and doesn't mean that I'm done.

SPEAKER_02:

Amen. Amen. Amen. And the Bible tells us, right? We go glory to glory, strength to strength. So we know today is gonna be better than yesterday, but we're still, unless we're all like Jesus, we're always gonna be in process and in the journey of healing and wholeness, without a doubt.

SPEAKER_01:

Yes, that's so good. Okay, so my favorite testimony from doing um the heart work, I'm gonna share mine and then I'm gonna ask you yours from doing body work. Um just because those are our specialties. Um, so my favorite testimony out of doing heartwork or soul work um is really totally understanding my identity on a greater level than I never did before, right? Um, prior to doing all of that, soul work, heartwork, and we use those tools, we use those words interchangeably, which is why I'm referring to them both. Um, because sometimes people don't understand what soul means, and sometimes we don't understand what heart means, right? So we just try to be inclusive. Yes, I digress. But mine is is just knowing my identity in Christ. Um, there were so many insecurities that were constantly sneaking in before there, where I was operating from a place of trying to prove um that I belonged to the kingdom of heaven versus knowing I did. And not to say that I don't still have insecurities, of course, they pop up from time to time, but it's different when you just have fleeting thoughts and maybe a day where you know you need a little extra prayer versus that's where I'm operating from is I feel like I don't belong. Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02:

That's so good.

SPEAKER_01:

I would say that's my biggest testimony.

SPEAKER_02:

What about you? Gosh, it's so hard. I first and foremost, I want to say this. Um, until I connected with you, I had no idea that our body holds the trauma in the ways that it does. Like I was so surprised how in a session, as soon as you got to my knee, something came up. And it was tied to something I never would have thought of. It was tied to something I never, you know, I didn't even know was there. And so really the awareness of what it, what my body is hanging on to was so key. And then it helped me to understand oh, this is why I have pain there. Oh, this is my body was trying to tell me that there was something here that needed to be released, right? But it never got the opportunity to release it. And until I saw you, I finally was able to feel freedom in that area spiritually, also from my body. Like my body was able to release what it had been hanging on to that I had no idea was even there because it was trying to tell me in a language that I just did not understand. Oh, so that's what I feel like it is too, right? Like it's like understanding the language of the body, I would say is just a key component of the body work.

SPEAKER_01:

Oh, that's so good. So good. Yeah. Okay, share with listeners what a heartwork session kind of looks like.

SPEAKER_02:

Yeah. So um there's a term used in a lot of other um healing modalities, but usually what I start with is the presenting issue. So um a lot of times people will come and see me because there's, you know, there's a presenting issue, there's something that's coming up that they're struggling with, and we work through that to see what it's tied to. Oftentimes it's tied to their, you know, their response to a situation is like a level 10 trigger, and they're trying to figure out what is this? Why does this bother me? Why is this creating such turmoil in me? And what we do is we go back and figure out what it's tied to. And so we'll start with that presenting issue, but then we'll dwindle down to get to that little one that's holding on to something, um, which is why it feels like a level 10. And we go after getting the pain comforted or the need met so that that house of beliefs and thinking that was built around that, which is possibly lies, possibly belief systems, we break that down, we bring Jesus in, we replace it with some truths so that the house can come down and we can get that person reintegrated. That's so good. How about you, Jen?

SPEAKER_01:

What does a bodywork session look like? So the bodywork is is a little bit different in that you're laying on a massage table, and the first thing that we're doing is just allowing a space where safe and healthy uh non-sexual touch can come into play. Um, and we do a body association exercise, and what we're really doing is strengthening the connection back between the brain and the body. When we've been through trauma, when we've been through stress, we start to disassociate from our bodies. And although that is a survival mechanism, we cannot heal from that place. Though, so that is an essential first step, is just being really in tune with what our body is doing in that moment. And so I walk through those um exercises, and like Britney said, sometimes I get to the knees and the Lord's already moving.

SPEAKER_02:

Like in my case, because I also dealt with a lot of disassociation.

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, and all that really looks like is I'm laying hands and I'm praying, I'm having the client just connect with that part of their body, and it's as simple as that is just strengthening that brain-body connection. And then we go, it looks much like a spiritual healing session, but we're often involving the body. So what I'll see a lot of times is that people's bodies will sometimes start to shake. Sometimes they'll start to feel pain in for no reason, and it will pop up. And all that's really doing is the Lord's bringing it to the surface to be healed. And so we're just asking Jesus along the way, like, what's going on here, Lord? What do you want to heal today? And He always knows the door to the healing, right? Sometimes we think it's a present, current situation that happened maybe last week that triggered us. But what really happened is that, you know, a decade before we went through some trauma. We have some pain and some hurt and some unforgiveness that's attached to a lie. And so we go back and we heal those just like we can do in a heartwork session, just like you can do in a spiritual healing session, but it's showing up and presenting in a different way. Um, and so we work through that with the Lord. We do some what I call somatic release. Um, that's a very popular term right now, and all that really means is different movements that allow your body to release that excess adrenaline and cortisol that's attached to it. And so your nervous system can finally come down to what we call homeostasis or peace. Uh, and then the body doesn't feel like it's carrying so much, and that's the simplest explanation I can give. And what I find is that uh people are craving uh healthy touch in a way, right? Um, single people probably don't get enough, married people probably aren't experiencing a ton outside of a sexual encounter, and they need just calming touch to regulate their nervous system. Like if we think about hugging someone super safe in our life, right? That feels so good. And there's actually a chemical reaction that happens within our body when that happens. We release oxytocin, which is a peace hormone in its simplest form. I know it does more than that, but that's the simplest form. It's it's a feel-good hormone, right? And that allows the body to come back and to regulate. So not only is there a feel-good aspect to it, there's a chemical reaction that happens within our body to allow it to come back. And so it really is all connected. I can't state that enough.

SPEAKER_02:

I know, I know. I love it, and that's why the other, you know, you mentioned something that's so key is a part of this too, is while we sort of are anointed and gifted to be able to do this, and we've obviously have done a lot of depth and research and just, you know, yeah, processing in our own journeys, none of it can be done without God. I mean, that's that's the other thing. I just like it's amazing to be able to see God work in each and every session, whether it's heart work or body work or combination of the two or spiritual healing. I mean, it all comes together and Jesus shows up every time and there's healing. And anytime we have an encounter with God, we can't leave except some portion of us being healed. And so I just I love this work. I love the ability to do it in conjunction with the Lord and get to be his vessel and watching him move. It's amazing. Yes and amen. Yes and amen.

SPEAKER_01:

So thank you so much for joining us on this conversation today. I will put the link where you can book with either one of us um in the show notes. If you have questions, feel free to reach out. If we there's something we didn't cover, um, we'll be we've talked already. We feel like there's going to be a part two to this because there's so much that the Lord does. So please email us your questions. Like we want to know how we can answer more because the Lord's done so much through both of our lives, through this process, and we want that healing for every single one of you as well.

SPEAKER_02:

Yes. Amen to that. Thank you guys. We'll see you next time.

unknown:

Bye.